sarah HANNAH gómez

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I didn’t think I was going to be writing these anymore, but then Henry asked if I had written mine for this year, and I realized I kind of felt like I needed to write a goodbye to them. It’s fitting that I’m posting my *last* one on the day I have a lunch date with the original author. Here you are, Henry. And everyone. And me.

Creed ’11-’12 I believe my fictions contain too many truths, yet I believe my truths are made of nothing but a combination of infinite fictions. I believe the present is fleeting yet ancient, like a worn, cracking library date stamp. I believe time stamps are for me and for posterity. I believe I’ve never cared so much, and I believe I’ve never had so little concern as I do now. I believe I am already prevailing. I believe I am not here to make friends; I believe friends can make me. I still believe in singing. I believe in quiet letter writing, flickering candles, and living in everyone’s past. I believe acceptance is liberating; I still believe in wishes, but I don’t need them anymore. I now believe in study, in myth, in solitude. I know I belong where I am.

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I own a Kindle now. It absolutely killed me to press that Purchase button on Amazon, but I had to do it. I have textbooks, I have novels, and I have tons and tons of pdfs to read for school, and I just couldn’t handle doing it all on my computer anymore. My eyes were killing me, and until this afternoon when I deleted a lot of old music, I literally had my computer telling me constantly that I had no disk space and needed to delete items. So I just cannot afford to keep all my school readings, but obviously I need them.

There’s also the problem of reading on the bus/train. Yes, I can read novels on the train. And if I’m sitting, I can maybe even read a textbook, though that starts to hurt my hands. But I can’t read my computer on the train, I don’t have a printer, and I don’t like the idea of printing 200 pages a week. That’s just ridiculous. So I decided I would buy a Kindle for school, and probably I will get rid of it when I graduate.

Except then I remembered the whole free ebooks from before 1923 thing. And I actually found quite a few books that were already on my to-read list that I just hadn’t purchased yet, or that are really hard to find, period ( Utopia and Portrait of a Lady would be the former, and The Little White Bird the latter). So now I have a decent Kindle library, and I’ve only owned it for 24 hours. Now I just have to get a case for it, cause wow, it does not weigh enough to remind me that it cost $140. But then I’ll be good to go! And I might have also downloaded a word game. Just for, like, airplanes.

Conveniently the Kindle has both 3G (I finally know what that means!) and WiFi, so I can sort of rectify my problem that I’ve developed since moving to Boston. I have never, ever cared about having a smart phone, and I still don’t particularly want one. But living in a new city with a preposterously unreliable and unpredictable public transportation system, and simply being a newb and not knowing the streets, the whole having Internet thing will come in handy if I find myself lost with nothing but my CharlieCard and my Kindle.

Still, it hurts me. I can’t believe I own a Kindle. (I also can’t believe how magical the screen is–I feel like I’m poring over Ella’s magic book in Ella Enchanted .) I feel like this is a betrayal as a future librarian and as a future novelist. I still own hundreds of books, and they’re not going anywhere. I’m still acquiring more books. But I think this will be a helpful educational tool. Just hopefully not much more than that.

Since the best thing to do with my time is find more ways to spend it not doing schoolwork, I have started a second blog related to all things food, diet, and dietary restrictions. It’s pretty sparse right now, but eventually it will have recipes, book and television show reviews, photos essays, and more. It’s called A Picky Girl Tries to Eat , because it’s not exactly my fault that I’m high maintenance.

the belzhar

february reading in review

what else i’m up to, and where

the walls around us

i accidentally secretly watched the entire twilight saga

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